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Sunday, March 30, 2014

Why You Should Have a Drink Before Dyeing Your Hair

I will never claim to be anything resembling an authority on hair.  Until a year ago I had never dyed it, save for the really unfortunate Sun-In experiment that I performed, against my mother's wishes the summer before sixth grade.  My punishment was having to grow out the bright orange hair the resulted, which was not so bad at first but was really unfortunate by the time picture day rolled around because the orange ring began right around mid-ear.

Last year I ombre-d it using the L'Oreal Feria Wild Ombre kit.  It came out fine; my then best friend and I did it together and as she is applying to med school we joked that if a future doctor and an engineer can't figure out how to dye hair, then our problems are a lot bigger than my soon-to-be screwed up hair color.  Fortunately we ditched the instructions and thought it through, starting by putting the color at the very ends and then gradually going up a little more rather than just brushing the color on at chin level and working from one side to the other rather than root to mid-shaft.  It came out fine, and grew out without any issues.


This time, I was on my own.  She was always the more daring one in our friendship and without her pushing me to do it, my stomach was going nuts signalling me that this was really a bad idea.

It came out okay once, what are the odds it will come out okay again?  Knowing my luck, that first time was pure fluke.

I bought the L'Oreal Preference Ombre Touch kit for dark hair.  It purported to offer a more subtle look but really I just liked the girl on the box's hair better than the one on the Wild Ombre box.



I thought about calling her even though we haven't spoken in quite some time.  Gloves on, squirt bottle of bleach in hand, little tiny finger comb on my index finger, I blanked and totally forgot what we did last time.

So I tried to figure it out all over again, and it was fine.  I sat back on the couch with my hair now doused in bleach and started freaking out again.  What if it came out terribly?  What if there was a big stripe around my head followed by the lighter color, like back in the sixth grade?  What if I missed some spots?

that's a serious anxiety face

Anxiety pushing me, I washed the dye out after the bare minimum of 25 minutes.  I excitedly dried my hair and kept looking in the mirror just to see that it was the same.  It looked the same as before.  What the fuck.

Oh well, I consider it a blessing because I'd rather it be super duper subtle than glaringly obvious; my disappointment with it looking the same is nothing compared to the disappointment I'd have if it was orange.


So this is my cautionary tale: make yourself a nice big glass of a tequila drink before you get started and be sure to have your inhibitions lowered so when you see the slightest hint of lightening you won't freak out and immediately wash the dye out.  I promise it will make it more worth your money.

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