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Tuesday, October 25, 2016

Rejection.

I knew it was a long shot and didn't expect to get in at all, but unfortunately that didn't make it sting any less.  Having my first communication with a school I applied to be a rejection has been damaging to my confidence for the remaining schools.  Of course it's Harvard and they accept only the best of the best, but for a few weeks there I was starting to think maybe I could be included in that category.

I'm not.

It's okay.

Well, it hurts, but it has to be okay.  I have to figure out how to let go of this, but unfortunately it has served to bring all those weird regrets I have about how I handled things when I was in my late teens/early twenties rushing back to the forefront of my mind.  It's silly to think one class could have been the difference..... but what if it was?

I'll be hearing from the next two schools in the next week, and my anxiety is greatly increased as a result of my rejection.  What if it's bad news from these two as well?  Was I really crazy to think I could get in???

Pray for me.  And my sanity.